Ah, the NBA Draft. The time of year when using terms like long length, motor, wingspan, and tremendous upside potential somehow won't earn you a punch in the face and a kick in the balls. While made up out of thin air phrases and others of their ilk are bad enough, they are merely the tip of a deep, bile-inducing iceberg.
It's never enough for an analyst to throw a dart at his board of cliches and senseless terms, regurgitating tired cliches and lame brained insight. A comparison must always be made. An incoming player must be similar to a player we have already seen perform on the court. A frame of reference must be given, or the drool will drip down our chins and our pants will become soiled.
Invariably, these comparisons revolve more around the looks (skin color in particular) and build of the players being used as opposed to their actual, you know, basketball ability.
My personal favorite has always been Deron Williams and Jason Kidd. Coming out of Illinois after a memorable comeback win over the Arizona Wildcats in the Elite Eight (choke on it, Wildcats,) I know Williams certainly reminded me of Jason Kidd. Point guard, big and strong, interracial, and, ummm, what else was there?
Oh, that's right. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Their skills on the court never compared. Two great players, with totally different skill sets. But hey, they're both kinda white AND kinda black. Mark it down! Let's do another!
This year's best example is Ricky Rubio and the breathless praise he's receiving in comparison with Pistol Pete Maravich. Rubio is similar in size and build to Pistol Pete. He's also not black. Remember, that sort of thing is important in this sort of exercise of outright stupidity. And he has floppy hair. And a schnozz bigger than mine. HE'S JUST LIKE PISTOL PETE!
Except he's not.
Maravich was known for his offensive ability, insane ball-handling skills, and showmanship. While Rubio can certainly pass the ball with flair, his outside shot is suspect at best, and he's known more for his defensive ability than anything else. Rubio's offensive game will never be mistaken for the flash and output of Maravich's, and Pistol Pete's defensive mindset would never, ever have been called lockdown.
It's easy to compare guys on looks alone but it's rarely right. Sure, Zaza Pachulia and Pau Gasol are European, tall, and have faces only their mothers could love, but you would never mistake one for the other on the court. The same can be said for Deron Williams and Jason Kidd, and Ricky Rubio and Pete Maravich (save for the u-g-l-y part.)
-if you read this and realized you've nodded your head in agreement to a Rubio/Maravich comparison in the past, go ahead and punch yourself in the balls or whathaveyou
1 comments:
You're wrong, mclane. His schnozz isn't bigger than yours.
Ten bucks says Rubio is as good as Brevin Knight, and no more.
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